DivMo's Obligatory Post on How Great The Dark Knight Was [Keeping Up with the Blogosphere]

That's right. I, like everyone else in the world, have seen The Dark Knight. And I, like everyone else in the world, thought it was OMG Best Movie Evaaahzz!! It's only been out for a weekend but is already like #4 on the super-official IMDB Bestie Movie Evaaahzz List guys! For serious: Go see it!

But why take my word for it when famous YouTube reviewer Sexman--who is neither a man, nor has probably ever had sex--can say everything I felt about movie while adding 10xs more "uh"s and "um"s and 500xs more voice cracks than I could ever pull off:



Not only do you get the great action and acting in this movie, but you get a second chance to giggle at Christian Bale's completely ridiculous breathy Bat-manly voice.



The real tragedy is that there are too few Bale Batman-voice parodies on YouTube for me to giggle over. Internet gods: Get on it!

Nic Cage Needs A Bear Suit Like That Woman Needed A Punch To the Face [YouTube, Will You Marry Me?]

When there is nooooobody in the office, this is how you end up spending your work-day.

Discovering the joys of The Wicker Man. Or, more accurately, Wicker Man tribute videos on YouTube.



First of all, how the hell have I not discovered the greatness of this movie before? I blame Josh Hartnett and Wicker Park for totally confusing me. That and all those white kids in 7th grade who were pretending to be black. OK, those are wiggers, but I blame them anyway!

Not only do I give you video of Nic Cage in a bear suit punching out a chick, but I also give you Nic Cage in various forms of dress punching out several chicks, stealing a bike, and "The bees! The bees! My eyes!":



And now again, set to the 90s classic "Scatman":



And to save the best for last: Nic Cage + "OH NOEZ THE BEES!" + Dance Remix = Bailey rides the rocketship to hyperbole planet to collect the right adjectives to describe this video's greatness. Until she gets back, you'll just have to watch it and be in awe:



Do I treat you guys right or what?

And the Award for Best Use of a Spike's Junkyard Dog in a Music Video Goes to... [Tough Gays!]

Another gem from my Boston-tagged YouTube video trolling...

There is nothing I love more than crazy genre-bending music. In fact, just last night I decided starting a death metal glee club would probably be one of the best ideas I've ever had.

So it's no surprise I find this "queerxcore" video by Youth of Togay for their track "Tough Gays" to be the most hilarious and scary thing I've seen in awhile (scarelarious?).

(Mildly NSFW due to mature screaming and adult situations with some junkyard dogs from Spike's.)



Never fear, I'll get back to my Bonnaroo projection-ing tomorrow!

Kids and Their YouTubes [A Story of Offensiveness, Obesity, and Boy-on-Hat Crime]

There's not much I can say except the internet is a crazy place and my new gig blogging about viral videos for Bostonist has me sifting through pages and pages of Boston-tagged videos, which has introduced me to a whole new world of crazy crazy shit.

This is one of those videos.



Oh kids and their racism, hat-ism, and shovel abuse.

My New Life Goal [Pencil Pushers of the Gods]

I was always a little too socially well-adjusted to truly fit in with the Speech & Debate Team in high school. But I've always admired the outcast (hence, the emo obsession). And in the case of the professional Speech & Debater (ahem, "master debater" as the joke went), they always had the sweetest pen twirling skills.

I try as I might, my pen always ends up across the room... in a cup of coffee... protruding out of my opponent's eye (an unfortunately fortunate way to win a debate)...

But after watching this video, my dream is renewed!



Now all I need is a yogi-type personal trainer to get my digits into top twirling shape! [Interested parties leave your official application in the comments.]

Look Ma! I'm On The YouTubes [Riding The Self-Promotional Wave]

A few months back a little sketch I wrote about the glories of made-for-tv-movies called "The Tiffani Martin Story" was committed to film by Downcellar Productions. It debuted at Improv Boston last Friday as part of their new film division and has now proudly found its way onto the internet. (The true home for all pervy and offensive things!)

YAYY!! Enjoy!



I would be totally remiss in my entertainment-providing duties if I did not also highlight the other hilarious commercial-parody sketches that came out of that day of shooting.

Hurley Brothers Home Furnishing



Connections: Daniel Plainview



Morelli Brothers Home Furnishing



And my personal favorite, Regal Osprey Blended Scotch Whiskey

Anyone Wanna Go Automobubbling With Me? [Just Follow The Bouncing Ball]

So I was doing a little YouTube research today to supplement a post I was planning to write on sing alongs* when I found this fantastic Oldsmobile follow-the-bouncing-ball sing along advertisement from 1931.

In honor of my Oldsmobile, Heyzeus, who is in the shop today because his "Check Engine Soon" light has mysteriously come on (get better soon baby!--and please do it cheaply!) I've decided to dedicate the entire post to the wonders of this nearly 7-minute commercial "In My Merry Oldsmobile."

And for those of you who think advertising has only become sexual and depraved in the most recent decades, I'd like to mention that this commercial features Peeping Toms, stripping, anthropomorphic sexual harassment, female butt enhancement, breaking and entering, sexual assault with a pair of dentures... oh, and the mysteriously naughty term: "Automobubbling"**

Just check out the lyrics to the song [wtf emphasis all mine]:

Young Johnnie Steele has an Oldsmobile
He loves a dear little girl
She is the queen of his gas machine
She has his heart in a whirl
Now when they go for a spin, you know
She tries to learn the auto, so
He lets her steer while he gets her ear,
And whispers soft and low:
Come away with me Lucile,
In my merry Oldsmobile,
Down the road of life we’ll fly,
Automobubbling, you and I.
To the church we’ll swiftly steal,
Then our wedding bells will peal,
You can go as far as you like
With me in my merry Oldsmobile. [That's how you reach 5th base my friends.]



Who knew "I have an Oldsmobile" was the ultimate pick-up line? I'll have to try it out and report back on the "outcome" of my "research." *WINK*

*Teaser alert! You'll have to tune in tomorrow to see what sing along has got me so excited!!!

**One of my favorite driving memories ever was when a group of friends and I caught a couple "Automobubbling" down 84. We chased them down so we could give them the thumbs up as we passed them. Yeah, we're a supportive bunch.

Emo 'Oh, No!' In Mexico: Can't We All Just Get Along? [And Weep About Our Mutual Loneliness?]

It is a sad sad day in the world of emo. Which, really, is like every other day in the world of emo, except now they're getting more press.

First, Fall Out Boy is forced to cancel their dream of setting a Guinness World Record for being the first band to play on all 7 continents in 9 months, due to stupid Antarctic weather. Damn you, global warming! (As an aspiring World Record holder myself, I feel for you guys.)

And now, I've been informed (by no less than two friends: thanks Liz & Jer), that emo kids are getting their asses kicked in Mexico!

Not cool! Especially since the underlying hatred equation is emo kids = fags, homosexuality = scarybad, therefore we must kick their asses.

So to pay tribute to the tragic past few days in the world of emo, I give you this video created by Mexican Emo kid, emoshopunk, scored to John Lennon's "Imagine" and titled "EMO MEXICO Anti-Anti-Emo."

Prepare to be touched.

Fact: It's A Lot Easier To Start A Pillow Fight Than To End A Pillow Fight [World Pillow Fight Day Recap: Boston]

As you know if you read my previous post, yesterday was World Pillow Fight Day and my urban playground group Banditos Misteriosos hosted it. With a little help from the Facebook social juggernaut and some great press from the front page of the Boston Globe's Living & Arts section (which you should totally read since I'm quoted in it and am officially famous now)...

...around 400 people attended the event. Which is awesomer than awesome. There are so many amazing pictures and videos of the event, it's hard to synthesize them all. Though I must say, I'm partial to the pictures I'm in... not for my sake but for my giant fish Winston's. (Man, does he love the spotlight!)

For example, here I am with Winston rushing into battle!

But really, when it comes to capturing the greatness of a massive flash mob pillow fight, nothing is quite as great as video. And, thanks to the glories of YouTube, there is a plethora of great videos to be watched.

Here are a few of my favorites:

Best video of the start of the fight and best use of the Mortal Kombat theme (EVER!):



Best Bill 'n' Ted-style commentary during the action (with most Banditos-per-square-inch cameos from Nick, Ondi, Ramy, and Jeremy moseying into battle)



Best footage of me hitting Caroline with a giant stuffed fish scored to the 90s rock of Everclear:



Best video of the fight from a small child's perspective:



Best Banditos-created video of the fight (courtesy of film guru Nick Carlisle)




Best Channel 7 News Coverage:



Best post-pillow-fight post-clean up hokey pokey:



Best time ever.

Racism Will Totally Ruin Your Clothes [I Heart Canadians and Their PS-eh?s]

Reason #3,235 I love Canadians: They make killer PSAs. This "Anti-Racism Girl" PSA was created by students at Oak Park High School in Winnipeg, Canada as part of their celebration of the UN designated International Day for the Elimination of Discrimination (March 21). (Hat tip to Boing Boing)



And here's another great Canadian PSA gem from the Concern Children's Advertisers. (I use this advice on all my first dates!*)



And for a little compare and contrast, check out this Irish commercial about the importance of paying attention. Fair warning, I first saw this 4 years ago when I was living in Ireland and the memory of seeing it for the first time still scars me to this day. Enjoy!



Lest you think all Canadian PSAs are happyfuzzybunnykittens, I've found one about kitchen safety and the burning potential of grease that's so disturbing, I'm going to leave it behind this text for the bravest to click.


* haha who am I kidding? I don't date!

Why Give A Kid A Pony When They Can Just Ride Rover? [Three Days Later and I'm Still Laughing About Kids Riding Dogs]

For those of you out there who were thrilled by the informative Teaching a Kid to Ride a Dog website that I posted about last Friday, but thought "Man! That's a brilliant idea, but that could never happen in real life, right?" I have culled the depths of YouTube to bring you video proof (!) that kids can indeed ride dogs.

"Riding Rudy" (set to the soft musical stylings of "Forever Young")

"Justy and Jagger" (fluffy dog alert!)

"Madelyn Riding Dog" (this one is particularly nerve-wracking given the tininess of the baby)

"Girl Rides Dog" (not only is the dog in question a tiny dachshund, but the dad actually advises the baby to "Grab her by the ears!")

And the winner for the most oversized kid riding the most undersized dog while wearing 'super fly' early-90s gear and demonstrating both the clean and dirty connotations of the verb 'riding' goes to...

"Andrew Riding a Dog"

[Acid] Trip Down Memory Lane: 80s & 90s Childhood TV, Rembering The Shows That Raised You While Your Parents Were Out Drinking

Because TV right now is lame and writer-less, I now present you with DivMo's Retro TV hour!

Remember any of these??

Attack of the Killer Tomatoes!!!!!



Denver the Last Dinosaur



Noozles!



Maya The Bee



Hey Dude!



David the Gnome (my personal all-time favorite... I forgot how amazingly cheesy the theme song was. Brilliant!)



All That / Kenan & Kel / Pete & Pete / Clarissa Explains It All / The Secret World of Alex Mac / My Brother and Me / Are You Afraid of the Dark? / Salute Your Shorts / Legends of the Hidden Temple / You Can't Do That on Television / Animorphs



Soooo good. They really should institute a 80s & 90s kid show nostalgia network. I know I would watch religiously.

If You See Something Scary On YouTube And No One Is There To Hear Your Screams, How Will You Ever Undo The Emotional Trauma? [By Blogging About It]

OK, here are the facts:

1) Garfield is a comic strip created by Jim Davis. It holds the Guinness World Record for being the world's most syndicated comic strip.

2) Garfield is about the life of a tabby cat of the same name and his owner, John Arbuckle.

3) For being as popular as it is, (like most "funnies" in the paper) it's generally really really really unfunny.

4) Someone (someones?) going by the name Lasagna Cat has decided to create video tributes to Jim Davis' strips: first by creating live-action reenactments of the strip (!?) and then by remixing the reenactment and setting it to a popular song (therefore upping the "wtfness" by 180 degrees and two shakes of the head).

5) Seriously, W.T.F.?! I can't tell if this is the best or most traumatizing thing I've ever seen in my life.*

Strip from 3/24/1979, Tribute set to "Bailamos" by Enrique Iglesias.

Strip from 10/26/07, Tribute set to MIDI version of "Cheeseburger in Paradise" by Jimmy Buffett and inspired by the early works of Neil Cicierega

You can blame the folks at the Best Week Ever blog for being the instigators of this traumatic experience.

*Definitely, definitely both.

News Flash! The Jonas Brothers Suck, Possible Links To 9/11, Bhutto Assassination? [YouTube Video Wars Are Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Tarding My Brain]

I'm not sure if you know it, but there's a war on guys!

And I'm not talking about 'The Iraq,' I'm talking about the YouTube war between Jonas Brother fans and ADiehardFOBFan. Idolator has been doing an amazing job documenting the entire incident, from the first The Jonas Brothers Suck video made by sk81337 (now stricken from YouTube for terms of service violations, but has been mirrored for posterity here, natch), to The Jonas Brothers Suck Apology video (which is really a "psych! You've been pwned! They still suck! And here's some more screaming Slipknot to prove it!" video), to when ADiehardFOBFan jumped into the mix with her aaahhhmazing "People are allowed to hate the terrorists responsible for 9/11, so I should be allowed to hate the Jonas Brothers" logic.

So long story short, there are about a million Re:Re:Re:The Jonas Brothers Suck and Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:Re:The Jonas Brothers Suck videos floating around YouTube all full of questionable uses of grammar, hairstyles, and angst.

And although I was the only one at my New Years party that could successfully identify them as The Jonas Brothers when they were performing pre-ball drop (upon which I was immediately asked: "Oh, do you work with kids?" --Ahhh, no. I ah, just read a lot on the internet I guess...), I honestly couldn't tell you very much about the band. Except they look like this:

So you can see why teen girls might get riled up about them. Mmmm jailbait.

Though my favorite of all the Re:Re:The Jonas Brothers Suck videos is definitely Dan540's Southern Gentleman's take on the issue. Because really, when am I not fighting over baked goods, earthy elements, and wind? Preach on, Brother!

And I would be completely remiss in my coverage of this incident if I didn't draw your attention to ADiehardFOBFan's detour away from Jonas Brother hating to deal with the gravest enemy to Fall Out Boy fans everywhere: Ashlee Simpson. Not only is she dating Pete Wentz, but she--gasp!--might secretly be 'the biggest prep in the whole-wide world'! In case you had any doubt on ADiehardFOBFan's feelings on the issue, she makes it clear in her title: Ashlee Simpson is a crackwhore.

This video includes a numbered list of why Ashlee Simpson sucks (attracting fangirls! the nose job! lip syncing! tearing Pete away from the band! FOB is losing fans! and they have links on stories that they'll send you if you message them personally to prove their claims!!!!).

But their Number 1 complaint about Ashlee?? (and my personal favorite)

Check Exhibit A:

"What are you doing with your hand right there!"

"Why? I would never do that to my boyfriend! That's disgusting! Even if you're alone, it's... it's just creepy."

I'm sorry to break it to you girls, but when you get older, you'll start to get these feelings. They're perfectly natural and nothing to be afraid of. I don't know how to say this delicately... but sometimes, well sometimes when you really like a boy and he really likes you... well, you're going to want to touch the ween. And it's OK, don't fear it. Go with it.*

Though I've pretty much summed up the good parts, the video is worth watching for ADiehardFOBFan's friend's amazing Cousin It hairstyle.

If only the presidential debates were this exciting! (Then maybe I'd be paying attention!)

*You all better be amazed at my restraint at not linking to the Pete Wentz ween shots here. AMAZED.

Have Yourself A Very Emo Christmas! [10 Songs For The Sad Santa In All Of Us: Because The Ribbon On My Wrist Says "Do Not Open Before Christmas"]

If you want me to get all Sound of Music on you, on the top of the list of my favorite things you'll find: downloading music, free stuff, holidays, emo kids, and crazy YouTube tribute videos. And of course my favorite of all favorites: that whole having cake and eating it too thing (pretty much all I've been doing at the holiday parties recently). But this time the cake will be metaphorical--easier on the hips that way--and will stand to represent my amazing ability to roll all of my favorite things into one giant yule log-like post!

That's right! I'm counting down my Top Ten Favorite Emo Christmas Songs!! And for all you skeptics out there who don't think Christmas and emo-ness go together, the proof is in the gingerbread man:

Thank God my roommates find my predilection for Hot Topic-ifying baked goods cute and quirky and not ah, seriously disturbing...

A note before we begin: If you like (or want to obtain for another reason aside from sheer enjoyment) any of the tracks listed, I've linked to their mp3 locations in the song names. In some cases you might have to do a little digging around on the page to find it, as many pages host multiple songs, but they should all be there and working [at least they were at the time of this post]. Fetus navidad, dudes!

[Oh, and for the record, you should ALWAYS click on every link in my posts because they are always ahhhmazin.]

OK! On to the countdown....

Fall Out Boy -- What's This?

There is absolutely nothing that says Emo Christmas Spectacular (On Ice!!!) better that The Nightmare Before Christmas. It is the sack full of angstified sugar that helps those Hot Topic perma-tricker treaters swallow their mandatory dose of Christmas cheer. It's also completely mandatory to be obsessed with this movie if you're a Fall Out Boy fan. (Just ask the #1 Pete Wentz fan over at YourSceneSucks.com.)

Punchline -- Icicles

There's no better way to let your ex know how you really feel about her this Christmas season than with an extended weather metaphor:

"Frostbite!! You are an icicle/Warmth of the season can't melt/This is the last time I let the winter have it's way with me/And I know how it feels to be spending your Christmas alone..."

The only video I could find on the Utubes that featured this song was of some dude just tooling around on his scooter. In shorts. Fucking hilarious.

New Found Glory -- Ex' Miss

Another track for that bitch who left you to go sleep with the soccer team:

"Everything that could have gone wrong went wrong this year/I know you never liked any gifts I gave to you/This holiday is overrated/It turns out the way I expected/Another year this time I regret/I spent too much time and money on you."

The video starts out with a little Nightmare montage before devolving into neighborhood kids lip-syncing in the driveway and throwing snow. That ex girlfriend could probably do better and so could this video.

Pansy Division -- Homo Christmas

Because "fag" is the slur of choice for emo-haters, I give you one of my favorite gay-themed Christmas songs this year. Trust me, you'll never look at candy canes the same after hearing this one.

"You'll probably get sweaters, underwear and socks, but what you really want for Christmas is a nice hard cock..."

Ahhmazin, no?

The accompanying video is also fantastic, especially with the elaborate disclaimers that start it off:

My Chemical Romance -- All I Want For Christmas Is You

It's not Christmas without Mariah Carey's pop juggernaut "All I Want for Christmas is You," a song so popular this time of year it's landed Mariah back in the top ten this week despite her crazy crazy career-killing bath-tub-climbing-in ways.

Finding the My Chem version was a pain in the ass so y'all better be thankful.

Blink 182 -- I Won't Be Home For Christmas

This is classic Blink humor. I'll let the video speak for itself; although it's just a fanvid, it's remarkably well-done and hilarious.

Standstill -- I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus

One of my favorite Christmas acquirements this year. Because Santa is an equal-opportunity lover.

"I couldn't make a noise/Who would have thought that he liked boys?/It seems that he's much further in the closet than my toys/...Not that there's anything wrong with that.../Maybe this year since Dad is queer I'll get some better stuff..."

Love. Love. Love it!

Culturcide -- Depressed Christmas

This is probably the most depressing Christmas song you'll hear all season. Due to its rarity, I couldn't find a YouTube version. But picture a man affect-lessly singing "I'm having a depressed Christmas" to the tune of "Blue Christmas" and then slow it down to half speed. It's so morose it brings a tear of joy to my eye every time I hear it. Click on the link and get it and then check out another piece of Culturcide amazingness: "They Aren't The World." [Wait for Bruce to come in at 2:15. Trust, it's well worth it.]

Sufjan Stevens -- Did I Make You Cry On Christmas Day? (Well, You Deserved It!)

Suf's spent many years and EPs "reclaiming" Christmas and this moody little number is one of my all-time favs of his 40 song+ efforts. Best line:

"I stay awake at night/after we have a fight/I'm writing poems about you/And they're not very nice."

And for a nice bonus for the House lovers out there, I give you this brilliant little piece of angsty House-Cuddy fanvid tribute:

And the #1 prize for Emotastic Christmasness in a Song goes to...

Fall Out Boy!

for

Yule Shoot Your Eye Out

The merits of this choice are so multitudinous that I am forced to present them in a numbered list:

1) Gotta love The Christmas Story reference
2) Not to mention the horrific Yule/You'll pun...
3) The lyrics blow all those other "Fuck the bitch who broke my heart" Christmas carols out of the water:

"I've been checking my list/The gifts you're receiving from me will be:/One awkward silence/Two hopes you cry yourself to sleep waiting by the phone/And all I want this year is for you to dedicate your last breath to me before you bury yourself alive/Don't come home for Christmas/You're the last thing I want to see underneath the tree/Merry Christmas I could care less..."

4) I have, in fact, been completely busted at a stoplight (and winked at!) for getting a little too riled up about that gift list (One awkward silence!!!!!!!!!!).

5) To be honest, the part of that song that makes me feel the most emo is the "Merry Christmas/I could care less" chorus. Grammar people! You COULDN'T care less!! Unless of course, if you were an emo kid. And then you could probably care less about well, everything.

6) This accompanying fanvid is exactly the amazing literal pictorial translation I would put together if I had such mad YouTubular video editing skills. For serious, that shit's hilarious. (Note the noosed doll in the freeze-frame.)

7) And ah, duh, it's Fall Out Boy... As if I listened to any other band anyway!

Now that I've emoed out all over this blog, I think it's time for me to get a little R&R. For the next seven days, I'll be off in the woods of Georgia with my family (cue the Deliverance banjos). Better yet, the cabin we're staying in is called--I shit you not--Bearadise Chalet!

I'll be back in action (assuming I survive) on Friday the 28th--just in time for our next installment of Friday's FanFic Finds! Yippee!

Mazel Christmakwanzswastika to all! And to all a tearful night waiting by the phone!

Breaking News! Adorable Internet Animals Are On Strike!

In solidarity with the writers strike, the adorable animals that have provided hours of internet entertainment to the bored office cogs and housebound alike have gone on strike.

The implications of this decision for CuteOverload are still unknown.

In my own show of support, I will refrain from being cute for the rest of the day. (Should be easy with the help of this awesome sinus headache!)

(NB: "Bestiality" tag employed for upping my Google Analytics stats only. Mwahaha.
Random web troller, you've been had. Now read my site anyway.)

Your Monday Morning Diversions: Rapping and Retards [It's Going To Be An Interesting Week]

First up, I give you the latest creation from the WGA writers on the picket line. You know shit's getting serious when the WGA gang signs are thrown. I just pray the talks today resolve happily for the writers before this erupts into an all-out street war. [United Hollywood]

And for your next bit of entertainment...

In honor of my voice's condition being upgraded from sounding like a 10-pack-a-day dirty old hooker to a more respectable (or at least audible) "They're laughing at me Daniel!"-level, I give you one more reason to love YouTube:

The Other Sister, As Reenacted by Retarded Barbie Dolls

Um, amazing. For the likewise obsessed, there's also a Part 1 (where they do it!) and a Part 3 (where Disney's Mulan, Emma "Baby Spice" Bunton, and The Beast from Beauty and the Beast make cameos to prove Daniel has more than one "Love Secret." Way to go off script kids!)

Yay! I Was Born! Yay! Yay! Yay! Hearts!

In honor of today being my Golden Birthday (24 on the 24th baby!), I now present you with the most awesome "Bailey Birthday" related videos on YouTube:

This high school awkward Bailey not only loves her Korean boy band DBSK, but she knows how to work that lollipop (a trait all Baileys possess, particularly the dog Baileys)



Bailey Unwrapping Presents



"Baileys Birthday" Silent Chicken Dance!



*Squee!!!!* Chaos with the 6 year olds at Bailey's B-day Party!



Bailey Eats a Cupcake



"Happy Birthday Bailey" Sweet 16 Silent Rock Out:



The Emily & Emily Show (Part 5) at Bailey's Birthday Party--Jessica Simpson never sounded so good



Bailey Downs A Dirty Pint



A Birthday Message to Bailey From Cove (Duuuuuuuude!)



And because I always get totally emo the day before my birthday (and apparently so does this Bailey), I present to you:

"Happy Ass Day"

this is pretty much a video of self destruct.
Nothings sadder then remanising on the past.

[If you're only going to watch one of these videos, this is the one to watch.]




Bonus (Minus?) NSFW/traumatizing Bailey Birthday related footage: Matthew baileys birthday stripper part two

YouTube My Mood: Today's Forecast: Zombies & Robots

Since pirates are so passe at this point, what's your vote for what (sub-culture, non-living) group is going to be The Next Pop-Culture Darling: Zombies or Robots?

Exhibit A (From Flight of the Conchords):


Exhibit B (A zombie fighting a shark, no joke)


Could sharks be the dark horse in this competition?

Voting (as always) is enabled in the comments!

When Cute Overloads: Who Would Win in a Fight? A Puppy or an Emo Kid?

What could be cuter than an emo kid?

Puppies!!!!! (In a little red wagon, no less!)

But what happens when cute meets cute for the ultimate cutetastrophy? According to my extensive YouTube research, puppies would kick some major ass.

For your enjoyment, I give you Puppies Attack An Emo:



And Puppies Hate Emo Kids:



And for the bonus round!! Puppy vs. Raptor! Complete with Jurassic Park soundtrack!